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MY WOLVES. A recommendum.

MY WOLVES. A recommendum.
Posted 2021-08-07 21:22:24 (edited)
welcome... to da pack



this is a referendum for my wolves, think of it as an urn or gravestorne for the still aliving... evenrually they will pass because i cannot afford tobuy sickness medicin or old age.i will makenew a post for every wolf.
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epic art "HOLY CR*P" -me when i saw this... by Heehoo Frog 30 🎁 (#19992)

first wolf:
NAME: Evil
SHORT BIO:
the main wolf ot the pack.

Looks
Base Black (5.7%)
Base Genetics Monochrome Dark I
BIO:
leader f the evil pack.. back story: he was born on top of a mountain by the grand canyon in the 1970s... his parents had to hide there because his family was being tracked down by the usa government fr terrorist acts.. "tch.. terrorist acts? all i did was get rid of that thug gang who calls them selves the "LAPD"" -evil

they were all on the run but his mom was so pregnant that she busted out 15 pups right into the grand canyon on accident. evil was the only one who survived the fall..he fell right into the river and rolled down stream until he got up. he was found and raised by humans who showed him the way of living in harmony with nature and not liking cops. "din't call fall that far  from the old tree... heh.. miss you mom and pops tch..." -evil

"how do i know about my parents if i was raised by humans you might ask.. well that's a whole other story for a different time... and i got all the time in the world buddy" -evil

when evil was 1 year old, he learned to talk in english by picking it up from the humans in the commune he was riased in. "no big d... heh" his brain expanded at a higher rate due to the constant mild Catnippis fumes surroundingthe commune.. well any way once him and his human friends got through the "human surprised by talking anuimal" annoying ass trope he explained to them that he knew where his parents could be.... "LAPD jail... them bastards. i saw on tv... the headine said: "TERRORIST WOLVES FINALLY CAUGHT".... it had to be my parents..if they weren't, i'd make them my parents or part of my pack anyway" one of the visiting biker hippies listened to my story and brought me with him back to cali . it was him who gave me my trademark sunglasses. i told you its a long story

when i got to LA... it was too late. they were already being executed american style out in the street. i ran as fast as i could, and i heard mom and dad yell out  : "thats our pup!! you made it outa the canyon! we love you son..your real name... ! is Evil!!!!" and right at that, i was still running.. only a few feet away.. i leap at the cop who got both his guns out pointed straight at their heads.. i'm only a few inches away going for his neck and i hear the guns go off.. when i spit his throat outa my mouth i don't even look. i just start running. didnt hear anything or anyone behind me..

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2021-08-07 21:48:55 (edited)
NAME: flirty and evil wolf
SHORT BIO: thes the "hot" one
PIC:
VERY COOL ART WAS MADE BY papi


Base Khaki (2.17%)
Base Genetics Cool Medium I (yellow)

BIO:



"hey... hot shot... im the real top gun around here.." -flirty

flirty evil wolf is a bad*ss wolf chick who wears goth style leather clothes tailored to fit a wolf with holsters for guns on each leg. she wears black and lime green neon leather boots with steel razer claws and has a leather tail sheath covered in razer blades. she has a semi helmet with a eyepatch that has a winking green skull with girly eyelashes on it.

she has leather pouches on her leather jacket gear to hold her pups for br*ast feeting.. she isvery strong so she can carry as many pups as she has n**ples available!

she has a psychich ability that makes you feel intense embarrassment that clouds your vision and judjement. shes 4 years old like me (evil wolf) (thats ADULT AGE for WOLVES!! SICKOS!!)

"yep. im flirty. im b*ass... nuff said." *pulls out all 4 guns at the same time and shoots your credit card number into the wall with bullet holes* you: "how did you know!!!" flirty:"hacked you honey....easy as pie with your brain intellect. next time don't trust everything you read on the internet."

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2021-08-07 22:12:28
NAME: looking 4 goth gf
SHORT BIO: he has no bio yet so i will right one now.

Base Black (5.7%)
Base Genetics Monochrome Dark I (EMO AND GOTH)

BIO:
looking4gothgf was not their real name...but it was the noly name they had left. ever since the Tide Wars of the 60s they wasnt the same guy since from before that.... "huh i nevere thought he was much of a GUY to being with!"-evil "STFU!!!! GET OUT I AM RIGHTING MY BIO!!!!!but thank yuo" - 'looking4gothgf'

from before the wor everything was a blur. they were borne before the jasoncident (the jason incident) immediately before it infact.exactly 0 years, 0 months, 5 days and 2 hours before it infact."whats the jason incidint??" - you may ask.. well tch obciously they arent teacking what they should in the schools 2day but what do ya expect... welp whelp i guess ill tell you. (third person mode -> first person mode)

i was only 0 years, 0 months, 0 days, 0 hours, 0 mintuse, and 1 second old. i just got launched ouf of of the cannon that you call the "birth canale" and i was just launched into my first set of soldiers gear..(helmet, backpack, soulder's uniform, souldiers gun, a demon warding smoke stick for smoking, a lighter, a deck of cards, a radio set, and a bottle of watter.) this was not uncommon for wolfes in that day and age. of course the united states goversnment had a strict laws and subjegation on wolves. we were second class citizens but at laest we werent 3rd class, which we were when before humans learned we could talk and think smarter than humans can. there were 10000s of child and baby wolf soldiers working for the USA Military in the Tide Wars and i was just one of the 10000s of them. there were also adult wolf soldiers too 

i was put in the soldier squad for nebraska, and we were set out to fight in a battle against the washington squeezers (the Tide Wars were a war about who would have the right to live on the coastline and nebraska was one of the main contenders because they were completely landlocked. they were fighting for their rights to be a coastal state

our first battle was with the washongton squeezers (they were a splatoon of guys and wolves fighting and were known for squeezing the life out of enemy which is why the yare called the warshington squeezers). our squads met in the middle of colarado mountains, when i was 0 years, 0 months, 5 days and 2 hours and minutes old.. i had my wits the bout me.... i was sweating on my gun, fingore on the trigger already. we were hiding in the grand canyon, looking out over the edge and saw him.

him

it was jason...

a chill rained down my spine. (and tail because tails are just the rest of your spine) and a chill ran down my fur too and i booked it down into the darn canyon. i could hear jason screaming, being shot to death by the rest of my squad. jason was just a guy who happened to be in the wrong place and the wrong time and walked into a battle he wasnt even involved in

and that was the jason incidient. "huh?? it was just a guy who walked in to a battle and got shot? wtf? who cares?" - evil "...NO.. it was just the START of the jason incidint....."

5 seconds later after being shot down instantly i ran back up the grand canyon and peeked out over the edge to see wtf was going on(i ran down because i got scared by the gun shots because i was a baby) and there he was...hes body on the red snow, dead. we got up and advanced because we thought he was part of the enemy forces and that he was the only squeezer left because the rest died from how cold it was.

he wasnt a squeezer. he wasnt anything at all.
we looked around, there was no more snow. we were confused
(fellow wolf soilder:) : hey capta9in.. where DA f**k are we..?(he was aloud to swear)
(catain:) : i... (he pulls out the map and looks at the map) i dont.. (he trys to see a landmark but it is just flat and dark)
(other wolf soldier): its pure dark
(me): jason did this

and thats the jason incidient

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2021-08-07 23:11:00
ABSOLUTE BEST

Pikachu
#409

Posted 2022-09-07 16:27:51
ASIDE: MINOR WOLFS..: (THEY ARE STILL IMPORTENT BUT THEY DIDN"T HAVE MUCH TO SAY OR TOO MYSTERIOUS TO HAVE LONG BIOS)

NAME: messedup twisted greendog
BIO: they say its the joker of dogs... one look at him and they will bite out your jugular vein... trained in  16 different types of judo and karate he is a certified legal murderer by the usa government... andhes not even a citizen (because hes a dog)

aha ha! HAHAHA! AHAHHHHAHAHAHA! AHHAHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH... AHHAHH.... HAHAH.... ahh.... sorry there i was just laughing at the joke that is your life ^_^ -greendog

thne next one...


NAME: the smart cool guy
BIO: Class. Swag. Champgne. That about sums up this spiffy wolf! Known for his war crimes:

1964 (Tide wars[Allied parties]): Aide of first degree manslaughter of civilians (inciting incident)

1967 (Tide wars [dishonorably discharged; rogue soldier]): 7 Counts of first degree manslaughter of civilians

1972: 15 counts of first degree manslaughter, 27 injuries. *Note: technically not a war crime, but to him it was.

1976: Disbarred by order of the state of California

1976: 2 Counts of public disturbance

1977: Discovered nuclear energy (wolf version)

1978-present: Official status unknown. Secretly working for the dark evil wolf clan, as the secretary and organizer of the department of crime.

and the next one.... is....


NAME:shiro sheer wolf (SHiro means "White",)
BIO:

this wolf is pyure white and dazzles everyone.. her evil power is that her fur is SO bright that it actually infact can blind people. she has the power to bristle her fur and angle all the hairs in a specific way that reflects 100% of light directly into people's eyes or wherever she wants. at night, the moon light is enough to prevent someone from seeing but in the day time the sunlight can let her burn holes through congrete blocks

and thats' it for the minor wolfs, they will die soon so this is there memorail.

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2022-09-07 16:37:47
NAME: NEW PUPPY
BIO: certain unspeakable crimes and deeds from this absolute nightmare have led to all records of their name (if they ever had one to begin with) being erased.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.

NERDASS DETECTED. NOT AHTHORISED. STOP READING. BEEP BEEP BEEP

[MIND ERASSING AGENT APPLIED]

***you hear lout static noises. as if your memories are being wiped****

now... you really wanna hear the truth huh? if you made it this far... then you're supposed to be here... regardless of what led you here; curiousity? nation-state loyalty? revenge? you have no choice now. your the one who has to live with the knowlege only god might be psychologically prepared to ever know. hope your happy


ARTICLE 13-E-0668: CLASSIFIED REPORT REGARDING AGENT 0668

---

--

DATE FILED: 05/23/2015

INTERPRETER: JOHN P STILE

DESCRIPTION: THIS DOCUMENT CONTAINS ALL AVAILABLE INTELLIGENCE REGARDING THE ENTITY KNOWN AS "AGENT 0668".

--

TRANSCRIPTION OF AUDIO LOG 0668-A:
"--ay and then when I pop out and yell? right? you just gotta act scared and say 'agh stop i could have dropped my croissant'. you got it? we HAVE to do this right now. the vine was posted THIS month right? 2014? its 2014?"

"its.. its 2015 man. this all sounds dumb as f*ck dude, you sound ACTUALLY ... like are you on medication? did you forget to take it or--"

"i swear to god man I KNOW I KNOW it sounds really f*cking dumb but WE HAVE TO DO THIS WE HAVE TO. TRUST ME.."

"like okay! damn okay! ill do it. okay? let go of me. im just... the future? theres no f*cking way donald trump became the president.. the guy from the apprentice? like who are you tryin to fool with this? so dumb"

"come ON m--"

"nevermind. nevermind! pretend i didn't say anything. okay? lets just record. f*ck."

*FOOTSTEPS; 5 SECONDS OF SILENCE. LABORED BREATHING*

"okay go."

*LOUD SHRIEK*

"ahh stop. i could've dropped my croissant!"

"..."

"okay? you posting it? what is that.

"... yeah, thanks it's perfect just trimming it."

"what's that"

*SOUNDS DETECTED: CLAWS COLLIDING WITH WOODEN FLOOR; LIQUID DRIPPING; LOUD LABORED BREATHING; WOOD CREAKS*

"we love it. we love it. we love it."

*REPEATED UNTIL END OF RECORDING*

*SOUND OF BREATHING AND LIQUID FLOWING UNTIL END OF RECORDING*

--
--
--

GAME THEORY: So Basically this is just like totally scary guys. This one is called NEW PUPPY Which is on all capslock which is by itself just so freaky? *my logo on screen*  *it is revealed that the previous clip was actually from the center part of the video, as a form of a preview, to trick you, the viewer*  aaaand hey everybody thanks for tunning into my channel, evil wolf theories, with the hottest theories about what in the hcke is going on in that wolf pack.. This is Roger the Wolf and lets just CRACK straight into the video.

So the evil wolf pack has a very Mysterious  member yall. THis guy has a messed up backstory. Lets read it.


certain unspeakable crimes and deeds from this absolute nightmare have led to all records of their name (if they ever had one to begin with) being erased.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.this dog is not real.

NERDASS DETECTED. NOT AHTHORISED. STOP READING. BEEP BEEP BEEP

[MIND ERASSING AGENT APPLIED]


Uhhhnnnnhhh wuuhhat the fuckkkkkk.... *is just simply mind-wiped stupid sytle* I like Justin Bieger music now.

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2022-09-07 16:44:08
NAME: The secretary
BIO:
"want to make a deal of your life? got the cash...? no...? not worth my time. *kills you by stomping*" -the secratery

fairly evil wolf. dont mess with her or her profits if you want to life...

shes called 'the secretary' but shes really the secretary of fun spreading. wolfs just call her the secretary because her department has a lame ass name.not her fault she didn't name it she just runs it

her real name is a secret to everyone, no one knows it.. if she trusts you, she'll let you calls her Koin. shes a gold dog and obssessed with gettin it... (gold) shes the secretary of fun for a reason. shes the boss of all fun dealing in the woods and cities in her territory. shes a quick talker and a quick thinker, and a hell of a business person. she can sell grass to a lawn mower, sweat to a body builder, even sh*tted jorts to a NFT guy


so whats a fun spreading? shes simply a simple toys salesperson.. just selling my various toys and wares here..spread some fun and joy for the children.. nothing unusual here oh ho ho... now you might say that sounds lame as hell and NOT evil. toys??? well buddy for one thing you are right it is lame as hell but thats because its a FRONT. the toys are a bit evil cus theyre made with slave labor (just like humans )but on her secret side she's a Evilolomy dealer. this makes her truly evil.

what is a Evilolomy dealer? they are people in this world who dedicate their life and risk their life to selling Evilolomies. well what is what Evilolomies exactly ARE?!.... they are various kinds of food and drink from across the world that are impossible to find.. they have intense affects. im not a f*cking idiot so i don't use them myself except for emergencies

Evilolomies for sale:

"Skinny histimine"
Price: 6 bit coin per 100ml

This one is the permanent cure to the flu. IF you  eat  it, you will be immune to the flu forever. However, it will also make you very weak to spicy food. if you eat a bell pepper, it would be like eating 15,000 habenaros at once. this will be your weakness for the rest of your life and its just really lame when you're in the middle of a fight and someone sprays pepper spray and you start crying andhave to go home for real.


"Napster"
Price: 15$

This is secretly just nail polish remover but you hype it up a lot and they go nuts for it. its all in the deal baby


"Pringle/Strapped Pringles/Pringles with da strap"
Price: 20,000$ for a pringle sized can

Pringles can with a gun inside. if you shoot someone with the gun, they start  "feeling healthy" so hard that you feel it too


"Black Quartz"
Price: $900 per gram

This is a solid black rock that looks exactly like obsidian. Why is it called quartz? So dumb
You take it by crushing it up and mixing it with water and rubbing it on your toe nails. it will make them grow very long, 3 or 4 inches. It doesn't make you feel very good


"Teletubby Juice"
Price: 10$ a can

It might look cheap but you need to drink a lot of it to have effects. the effect is cumulative over a long period of time. it comes in a soda can and is a clear tasteless liquid. it gives you the super power to feel immense pleasure in the entire body


"Spongebob hair"
Price: $50 dollars per hair

a nasty booger looking yellow hair. its a hair covered in something,. makes you lactate yogurt doesnt feel very goodb


"Super Monkey Ball"
Price: PERMANENTLY OUT OF STOCK

Looks like a toy capsule for those cheap toys at malls and stores. it looks empty but if you quickly sniff the air inside the capsule it will smell very good. it makes you feel very good and lets you teleport various objects and liquids tio your location by smelling them. it's hard to do because it requires using olfactory sensory organs as a,n "output device" rather than "input".

UPDATE 04/14/1999: super monkey ball is BANNED from being sold by ANY department of evillolomy. turns out people can just do that inherently and there was nothing in the capsules. this is too dangerous of an ability for people to know about

UPDATE 06/25/2002: cover story successful. planted agents at sega japan have ensured the 'super monkey ball' video game brand has been sufficient in making google search research into this phenomena impossoble.


"Pure liquid"
Price: $89,000,000 per 2 liter bottle

distilled form of liquid. can be frozen into a pure solid and boiled to a pure gas. on collision with a body part, will duplicate the body part, connected at the nearest joint. (if put on a finger it will make yo have 6 fingers) however the body part cannat be conntrolled or feel anything other than extremely good constantly. people will use this in combo with the pringle gun to get an incredible feeling without the downside. we are prepared to deploy cover-stories in case of escape of affected pringled people, because its worth how mujch money we get

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2022-09-10 09:39:30 (edited)
the heck?!
Forsee626
#78733

Posted 2022-09-25 20:29:45

NEW WOLF ALERT!




Pup Tart

"This Wolf is part puptart(poptart for dog/wolfs)"

BIOPRAPHY::


This dog/wolf was found in the desert and you know what.... he doesnt even know how to talk...
thats right....




this wold? Can't fucking talk. he never learned how to speak AT ALL. No noe bothered to teach him, he grew up alone and cold and afraid just eating granola bars stealimg them from the ALDI's dumpster.

the workers would throw things at him and call the Police! but he would just keep steaking DESPITE being arrested multiple times. They had to kick him out of jail becausue he couldn't understand the language and thus, could not give any kind of identification or ANYGHING. so the cops would just say :

"tch! (<--lamely not coolly)  This f*ck*r can't f*cking talk. (<--- swearing like a loser not in a cool way) I can't type hsi name in the computer! Hurr Durr I'm so DUMB I CAN BARELY BREATHE!!!!!"

.... Okay maybe the COps didn't say that, heh heh heh.... THats a little bit of "author's embolishment". Any way. Back to the wolf story.

He might not be ablet to speak, or read, but he alsocan't understand people when they talk to him. you ever see a show with a character that doesnt know english and then someone is talking to him and he just f*cking understands for no reason? that sh*t is so unrealistic dumb

evil wolf guy
#23684

Posted 2022-09-25 20:39:41

OLD WOlF... BUT STILL A GOOD ONE


(thir one was from the old thread but now im putitng them all here so it might say he's new but he actually ran away. if anyone wants groffly you need to give me the game money so i can buy him back cus he ran away)

introducing a new wolf to the pack.. their name is groffly (evil's note: the game is too boring to play enough to get more wolfs slots my for my pack... so you can meet them here instead)

GROFFLY



[stats: 600]

[appearance: black with green and brown spots on his back.. 6 bullet hole scars on his right side]

bio:



he's been in the pack since the very beginning.. which is a big deal since we discovered wolf nuclear energy and used it to discover wolf time travel... anyway.. groffly used to be in the united state military. his story begins in the '50s..

he was only 16 years old (in wolf years) and enrolled in a human high school.this was a typical things to happen, before they made wolf schools. human parents would "adopt " wolves, strip them of their culture...and shove them into human schools. he had no idea what kind of histroy came before him, it was all lost to the ignorance of humans..

he had No friends at school. therewere a lot of kids at his school, who thought that having a wolf as a friend would be "cute" or "cool", but they didnt care about him. they just wanted the noveltry of being that "the person who knows a wolf". there were no other wolfs at groff's school. there was a furry, but they were even worse back then and groffs standards were higher than that...

being an outcast with no friends made him a much sought after target for the military requriters. he instantly was placed in classes with the CIA-plant classmate throughout his highschool carreer. the principal gets a fat cash bonus whenever a student becomes friends with the CIA-plant classmate. And stuffed his pockets became...groffly fell right for the bait and became friends with him.

the cia-plant classmate did his usual ring-a-marole, pretended to be his friend, and got closer to him to more effectively recruit him into the military. of course, every kid knows who the cia guy is, even thoughthe teachers think they're all too stupid to notice. even groffly knew, but he was so isolated he became friends with him anyway. brutal, huh? well,. he was desperate.

like clockwork, the undercover recruiter would pretend to be his friend, every day. groffly would vent all his teenage sadness and loneliness to him, while the plant would pretend to listen and ask groffly if he knew any other isolated kids he could target. groffly pretended to have a friend for all of high school, because it was still better than not having one at all.

when he graduated at 18, he knew he was falling for the propaganda like a chump, but he was like ' well i have nothing else to do anyway.' and enlisted the military anyway.. he was shipped out to military training as quickly as possible. wolves are very strong and fast, so they are very desired for being put out on the front lines. groff was trained in the arts of wolf combat, as well as military combat, in the B-22 WOLF army squadron. it was his frist time meeting other wolfs like him. he was so excited to meet them, but they were all so isolated just like him through their lives. they were all such damaged wolves, they couldn't form bonds like healthy people.

the wolf squadron was designed this way..although they couldn't form regular relationships, the wolves were forced into situations where they would become tied together by their shared traumatic experiences. the training exercises were set up in this way to make the most effective squads, and get all the wolfs solders working together. for example, the types of training they would do:

1. harm to a fellow soldiers body and then pushed into a hole, while everyone is forced to ignore it
2. trained to be ready to psychologically torture a fellow soldier, in case they had enemy's sensitive information
3. made to play hot potato with a live grenade
4. randomly burn down the barracks and blame it on a soldier
5. force a soldier to drive down a mountain blindfolded while amother soldier has to give directions

they did this and much more horrendous messed up stuff that i cant say.. some wolfs didnt survive but that was planned from the beginning. they had calculated the most quick and inexpensive method to make effective soldiers and losing some wolfs along the way was either an acceptable loss, or an effective technique for squad bonding either way its messed up.the sad thing is that groff knew about every little detail of this process but simply didnt care to speak up or quit or do anything about it, because he was just there to do what he was told.
he rose through the ranks of the usa army, fighting enemys he knew were being attacked for no reason, fighting along side epeople who were patriotic and valiant, saw the enemy fight with valor, and with many other soliders who simply did not care like him. he saw many civilian death, went along with committing many atrocities on civilians, not finding any pleasure in it but not any pain either. he lived like this for decades.

he was considered a real true hero by folks back home. he fought and succeeded in so many missions that he was regularly used as an inspirational story to other soldiers.folks back home would think him to be the very concept of a patriotic soldier. they'd clutch their american flag and squeeze out a tear picturing someone who loves their country that much. someone who would leave everything behind to fight for the innocent..

but grof wasn't any of that. he didn't have anything to leave behind. he never did. his only friend was an army recruiter and he was adopted. he didnt care about anyone from his country and spent over half his life fighting for nothing. but it all changed when we showed up...

we had just learned how to do wolf time travel using the wolf nuclear energy the smart guy came up with, and on the test flight we stepped right into a battleground. it was so smokey with war and death that it was impossible to tell where we were.. it seemed like the battle had just ended cus it was dead quiet. and right in front of us was the only survivor, groff, covered in blood and some other stuff too. he dropped the corpse he had between his jaws and looked up at us..

now youd think this would be the part where we make him realize what a messed uip kind of guy he was being.. maybe makle him finally feel something by meeting some real geniuine wolves..but that wasnt it at all..

i just stepped forward and introduced myself and sinply asked: "you look like a evil guy. wanna join our clan?" and spit out my tooth pick and he just got up and walked right in our time machine with us. he dropped everything and joined us right there. he hasn't changed at all, just rolls with what we do. none of us have ever seen him smile, or cry, or even get angry. he just exists.

evil wolf guy
#23684

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