merryville (pasde and doubledare)
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Posted 2022-01-19 12:36:53
When Artem did finally get up, he found Mernie by the front door to the apartment. "Waiting for Josh?" He asked, and Mernie nodded, evidently his mind elsewhere. Artem headed for the kitchen to scrounge up some leftovers before returning to the living room. Mernie was doodling on the back of his book, lost in thought. It was nearing dusk, when the door opened. Josh was back, but Austin was not with him. That wasn't unusual; scouts generally traveled separately to cover more ground in the same amount of time. There was only so much daylight, and it would start waning as winter approached. "What's up, boys?" Josh asked, hanging up his jacket and undoing his holster. It was empty, seeing as he didn't know the first thing about using a gun and didn't want to learn, but he always said he felt better wearing it. Some kind of false protection, Artem assumed. From afar, it probably looked like he carried a weapon, and that assumption would keep most people from approaching. So maybe the protection an empty holster provided wasn't false at all. Artem didn't quite understand the logic of it, he much preferred to have his rifle loaded in his hands at all times when he went out, but that was just him. Maybe he was paranoid. Mernie shrugged. "Not much. We were waiting for you, to see if you wanted to go up on the roof tonight." Josh glanced at them, raising an eyebrow like he was a disappointed parent, but there was a glint in his eye as he shucked off his shoes. "Whatever for?" He asked, feigning ignorance. Artem snorted. "Stargazing, Josh. Duh." Josh snickered, seeming to ponder the idea over before he nodded. "Yea, alright, sure. I'll go get blankets and pillows." Mernie pumped his fist in the air in triumph, dropping his journal. Artem grabbed it, running off to their room and ignoring the shouts of protest from his friend, whose footsteps he heard chasing after him. Artem tossed the book on the bed, and Mernie caught up, shoving him playfully before he stuffed the book under his pillow for safekeeping. "I'll go find Joe and Liz. Did you ask Cass?" Artem froze. "I forgot." Mernie waved a hand. "That's alright, I think it's probably too late now. The twins would notice if their sister wasn't getting ready for bed with them." Mernie was right, but Artem felt bad. Perhaps it was for the best. He doubted Antoniniana would have agreed to let her daughter stay up with the older kids, anyway. A few minutes later, and they had all reconvened on the roof, sneaking as quietly as they could so they didn't disturb the adults' evenings. Ellie wasn't there, and Artem glared at Elizabeth. Mernie copied his facial expression until she noticed. "What? I tried, okay? She said she was busy." "You're an awful liar, Liz Love." Josh admonished, laying out the blankets and setting up the pillows for each of them. "Gah, fine! I knocked on the door but no one answered. I think she really was busy, cleaning, or something. Literally, I mean, all day." Artem bit back a sigh. Her story sounded plausible. He didn't push the matter any farther. The night sky was still young, a few clouds drifting in and out of focus, and the stars were just coming out. They spent the next few hours, listening to Liz and Joey chatter back and forth mostly, but then Mernie nudged Artem. "Do you hear that?" He whispered, and Artem tried to tune out their friends' voices. Below them, he picked it up: another pair of voices, softer. Someone on the ground? Infected? Scavengers? Both? Josh must have heard it too. "Quiet, you two." He said, shushing Liz and Joe. Mernie got up, the only one to dare to crawl over to the edge of the roof and look over, but it was too dark to see. Two figures, cloaked in shadow. The stars weren't enough illumination for him to see their faces. Suddenly, he jumped back, and a second later, the bang of a gun going off snapped through the air. They all sat, unmoving, and in the silence, they heard Ellie's voice. Crying. A door opened. Josh got to his feet, running for the door to get inside. "Stay here," he said, but of course, they were all following him. It felt like ages and miles of thudding metal steps before they reached the bottom floor, and the scene outside was ghastly. Austin's body lay crumpled, a suspect dark liquid pooling around him. Ellie, clutching Antoniniana, and Nellie, standing there, assessing. "I killed him. He told me to." Ellie's words hung in the air, threatening the rest of them as Antoniniana brought her inside. Nellie turned to see the rest of them, shocked. "Elizabeth, go inside. Joey, go get your father and Cyrilan. Josh, you can stay. You two," he said at last, addressing Artem and Mernie, "Go inside as well. Go see if Antoniniana needs anything." The night passed in a blur. It was dawn before he knew it. Mernie, at least, expressed relief that Nellie hadn't asked them to help with Austin. Artem couldn't help but agree. The children had slept through it, thankfully, but every time Artem went to check on them, or Liz, or Mernie, he found he had nothing to say, no matter how he tried. He felt lost; why was he here, why were any of them here, why were they leaving Ellie alone? She needed help. But Antoniniana had sent her to her room and forbid anyone from speaking to her, as if the girl were in jail. Artem had to wait by the door with Mernie, in a way that was oddly familiar. They had been here not twenty-four hours ago, but now, everything was different. Someone was gone. Permanently. The men returned after doing god-knows-what to the body, slinking off to their respective beds. Austin was not coming back. What did they do with that? No one was fond of him, aside from Ellie, but he was with them until the end and didn't deserve to get infected. Ellie didn't deserve to do that to him. Why did he make her? For as sorry as he felt, there was also anger. It was numbing, and confusing, and when Ellie finally appeared with the sun, Artem shot to his feet so fast, he knocked over Mernie, who'd been dozing. Ellie made breakfast. And then she went out on the fire escape, pretending she didn't see Artem there the entire time. Maybe she wasn't pretending, he told himself. Maybe she was just as lost, if not moreso. Never before had he questioned what she did when she went out there, but now… He peered through the window, heart thudding. He didn't want to go out there, nothing between his feet and the air but a thin metal platform. He shuddered, thinking of the cold, damp morning air, and the accursed wind he knew was waiting to sweep him over the edge and throw him to the earth. But there was Ellie. He needed to make sure she was okay. To hear her voice, at the very least. He'd be able to tell, then. So he lifted the window, swallowed his inhibitions, and climbed out onto the fire escape. "Ellie?" He asked, voice small and fearful no matter how he tried to bolster it. Shutting the window behind him, he found he couldn't move away from it, afraid to take another step away from the building. He tried to find his courage again, but he kept one hand on the windowsill. "Ellie? It's Artem." She knows it's you, idiot. |
 stingray #17818 |
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Posted 2022-07-19 07:36:19
"Artem? Why are you here?" Ellie didn't mean to sound so cold as she spoke. She had just been so out of it, that he had surprised her, startling her in the process. "Sorry, I didn't mean to sound like that, I just- Uhm.. I wasn't expecting you to come out here. Or anyone." She said, attempting to sound a little more friendly. She wiped at her eyes again, taking another breath, still trying to keep herself composed. It was hard. She was sure everyone here was mad at her, but really, what she had done was inevitable. If it wasn't her, it would have been someone else. He was infected, and he had to go. Yet, she still couldn't help but feel overwhelming guilt about the whole thing. If it wasn't for her, he wouldn't have gone as far into the city as he had. Just the thought of that made her feel even more emotional than before, but she didn't want to cry, especially not in front of Artem. "This is all so stupid, Artem. It's not fair. I guess life never is. But especially now." Ellie said, letting out a sigh after she had finished speaking. She felt sick to her stomach, the nausea hitting her out of nowhere, forcing her to move to try and be more comfortable. She crossed her arms tightly, resting her head on her knees, closing her eyes tightly. Everything felt terrible. How was she even supposed to come back from this? She couldn't fathom it. "It's my fault, Artem. I killed him." Ellie murmured, her eyes still shut tight. "God, no, I- You don't get it. I don't expect you to, obviously, there's.. More to it. He went outside of the normal boundaries to go to this music store downtown, to get guitar strings. For me. If he hadn't gone all the way out there for a pack of stupid guitar strings, he would have still been here right now. It's entirely my fault." Ellie said, now unable to hold it together anymore. "He- He was a jerk sometimes, but.. I mean, I loved him. I still do love him. He could be really sweet sometimes. He just didn't show it often." Ellie said, starting to cry once she had finished speaking. After a couple minutes, she composed herself, looking out at the city again once she had calmed down enough. "So.. Why did you come out here? You didn't exactly answer my question before. I mean, you kind of had no reason to. It's not like we talk or anything. I only ever really talked to.. Y'know. Austin. Or Antoniniana, when I have to." Ellie's tone was hard to read, which wasn't exactly unusual, but still. It didn't make anything easier here. "I'm going to go inside. You can come with me, if you want. I could use a drink. Austin, he, uh, kept a bottle up on the top shelf in the closet. He was saving it for a special occasion, but.. Now seems like a good time too. It's good stuff. From Fort Homer, I think. I'm not really sure how he got it. It's impossible to get in there. I'd know." Ellie said, letting out a bit of a laugh, although it was quite obvious she wasn't amused by anything that was going on. With that, she got up, not exactly caring if Artem followed. Once she got up to her room, Ellie quietly opened the door up, slipping off the jacket she was wearing, tossing it down at the foot of the bed. With that, she went to the closet, having to go up on her tip toes to reach the bottle on the top shelf, taking it down and putting it on the side table next to the bed moments later. As she looked at the bottle, she was met with the overwhelming nausea again, having to sit down in order to feel better. She knew it was the guilt and anxiety over the entire thing piling up, but what was she supposed to do about it? "Help yourself, Artem. There's plenty. It's a full bottle. No way I'm finishing that myself." Ellie said, sounding tired as she spoke. She opened the bottle after she had spoken, realizing she didn't have glasses for the drinks. "Uhm, hold on.. I might have something up here. Let's see." Ellie murmured, mostly thinking out loud, clearly not looking for a response. "Hey, here we go. I found these a while ago at some store a few blocks away. They'll work." Ellie said, placing them down on the side table, pouring two drinks once she had done so. "Drink it slow. It's meant to be enjoyed. I mean, I'm sure you know that. But still." Ellie said, taking a small sip from her own glass, wincing a little as she did. "Not bad at all. What do you think?" Ellie asked, trying hard to make conversation. The alcohol helped a little, sure, but still. She felt terribly awkward. "Do you, uhm.. You like scouting? Sometimes you can find some good stuff. That's how I found most of the stuff in here." Ellie said, taking another sip of her drink. Despite her attempts at making conversation, it still didn't feel right. After a couple minutes, Ellie laughed a little, this time, a genuine laugh. One that Artem likely hadn't even heard before, because she'd never had a reason to actually laugh in front of him. Or anyone here, aside from Austin. "I'm sorry. I'm terrible at this. I've never been one to talk." Ellie said, laughing still, taking yet another sip of the drink. "Uh.. I'm not sure what to say. I'm sorry. Really. I'm sure this isn't any fun for you." Ellie said with a sigh, finishing off her drink, lying back in bed once she had finished it, shifting around a bit to get more comfortable. "I guess I'll have to go talk to everyone later, won't I? About him? Nobody's happy about it, that's for sure. I know a lot of people weren't exactly.. Fond of him, but still. He was helpful. Always willing to help out." Ellie murmured, crossing her arms over her stomach again, still feeling rather tired. "It probably wouldn't be good to sleep now, right? It's too early. What time is it anyways? Oh, shit. Eleven in the morning? It's early. Too early for drinking. Well, now I feel bad. Hmph." Ellie muttered, closing her eyes anyways. She was a mess, and she knew it. If she had fallen apart this soon after Austin's death, how would she fare a month from now? A year from now? Would she improve, or would she just spiral further? She didn't know, and that scared her. She hadn't ever experienced anything like this before. Without the help of a distraction, all she saw when she closed her eyes was his lifeless body, the scene replaying over and over in her head. "Artem? Have you ever lost anybody important to you?" Maybe the question was a bit out of line, but her judgement was impaired. Like she had said before, she wasn't much of a drinker. One drink, especially a stronger one, made her tipsy. She was feeling it. "I don't get why he was important to me.. I mean, I do. He meant a lot to me. When I first got here, I didn't know how to talk to any of you. I still don't. So I just did my tasks and minded my business. You were all already friends, or you were all already in relationships, and I just didn't really fit into any of them. But then Austin started talking to me. He kind of.. Made me feel like I fit in. Like I belong here." Ellie said softly, starting to sound a bit more emotional again. "I was able to.. Talk to him. About everything. He made me feel cared about. Now that I think about it, he didn't really talk to anybody else either. That's why he.. Made me do it. Kill him, I mean.. I don't think he trusted anyone else. Not in a mean way, he just didn't know you guys all that well. But I.. I had never killed anyone. It hurts. Especially him. I wish I didn't have to do it." Ellie spoke quietly when she talked about him, her voice barely above a whisper. "Does that even make sense? I don't know. It's stupid." Ellie muttered, another tired sigh escaping her lips. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm talking about this. I wish I could just shut up." Ellie mumbled, sitting up again, reaching to pour herself another drink. "You want another one? Really, there's more than enough." This was just an attempt at keeping herself quiet. Artem didn't need to know anything about her relationship with Austin. Nobody did. It didn't matter anymore. She quietly sipped at her drink, looking around the room, everything in here serving as a painful reminder of Austin. They had set the whole room up together, how could it not remind her of him? She finished off her drink, clearing her throat after the fact, speaking again after a moment. "Can we go somewhere else? It's about lunch time, I should start making lunch." Ellie said, almost absently. She put the bottle back up in the closet, and with that, headed out to the kitchen, gathering everything to get lunch started. There were a couple people out at the table in the kitchen, but she chose to ignore them for now, not wanting to have another conversation. She put everything in a pot after she had prepped it, looking tired still as she did so. "Hey, Artem? Would you mind getting one of the cans of vegetables up in the cabinet? They're on the top shelf. You're taller than me and I can't reach them." Ellie said, smiling over at him while she asked, hoping that would be enough to convince him. After their talk earlier, Ellie realized that maybe talking to Artem wasn't so bad. He seemed nice enough, and honestly, his company was pleasant. She wouldn't mind if he was someone that she became friends with. |
 Double Dare #18737 |