Otherkin / therians / other-hearts
|
Posted 2023-10-06 11:41:33
So, in short I experience "phantom" limbs, feral "urges" (like catching/ chasing small animals, digging burrows in snow, etc), I ran around on all fours extremely often as a kid (literally just quadrobics, still do but like verrry occasionally), very, very frequently pretended to be an animal as a kid, often fantasize about being an animal, and a few more but this is just the general gist of things However, I don't believe that I am an animal, at least I think I don't? As in, I recognize and accept that I have a human body, and I don't really feel bad about it? But if I had this option to change my appearance in any way possible, then I am more than certain that I would change myself to be some kind of animal. I'm not sure if that counts though Also to add, specifically in forested and mountainous environments, I secretly wish that I could just run off the trail into depths and never return, though again, not sure if that counts lol *also also, I'd like to mention that I am a furry, and have always attributed all of my therian-like experiences to being a furry up until my partner suggested me being a therian. I'd just like to leave this here in case I was right the whole time and all of my experiences were just furry-related |
 End #33262 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 13:26:38
|
 Eulalie #87410 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 13:38:16
If you wouldn't mind me asking, how would you describe figuring that out, exactly? As in, how would you know that what you feel inside is not inherently human, and more animal? Sorry if that doesn't make sense, I can re-word it if needed ^^" |
End #33262 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 14:17:58
Many therians experience at least one of the two experiences you described (phantom limbs and animalistic urges). I experience both to some extent, but they're not the only things that clued me into my own animality. Personally, I sensed a lot of disconnect between myself and others for much of my life. I felt more comfortable around animals and like I had to learn to be a person, in a sense, since communicating with other people didn't come as naturally to me. I never connected with the word "human" and, though I recognized my physical humanity, struggled to see myself as truly human, always visualizing myself as an animal instead. Whenever I tried to participate in groups, I felt distinctly apart, like there was a wall between me and the others. I even tried (and still sometimes do) to contextualize human interaction through the lens of social bird communities. Eventually, I encountered what I would later learn to be my theriotype during a birding trip, and I really saw myself in them. They sort of made everything make sense, in a way. But that is just one experience among many in the community and I'm sure others experience their nonhumanity differently, so I invite any others to share their experiences as well ^^ |
Eulalie #87410 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 15:12:40
 and I mean not to love this animal very much but be this animal inside
|
 🐉🎃CaelumΘΔ Main Ox Fan #65437 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 15:32:17 (edited)
Oh wow, that's really interesting actually! I think I'm able to relate to seeing an animal and feeling a sort of connection with them. I live in a city, so unfortunately the only way for me to see a lot of animals is through zoos, but I have a very distant memory of myself when I was maybe 7 or 8 at a zoo, and I just felt this intense link between me and a certain animal upon seeing it. It was a really long time ago and I don't exactly remember what animal it was, though I suspect it might've been wolves? I've always had a pretty big bond with wolves as a kid, though again, it might've been my imagination. Unfortunately I can't really trust my past experiences, since when I was in middle school/elementary school (specifically from grades 3 - 8), I was in a reeeeally toxic religious environment, and suppressed a lot about myself. I'm in a much, much more accepting environment now, so I think that what I've suppressed might be slowly resurfacing again? I'm not sure. And for my experiences before grade 3, they're a bit hard to fully trust, mainly just because they were so long ago. I could easily say "I've always felt more comfortable pretending to be an animal whilst playing than actually being myself" (an actual experience of mine), but how would I know it wasn't just my imagination? There are so many things that I enjoy doing that can be considered "signs", such as loving being in forests, climbing trees, making burrows, chasing small animals, messing around in creeks and rivers, and the list goes on. But how would I know that those things are not just.. things that I enjoy doing? My friends and I have very polarized ideas on the definition of "being outside", as whereas they'd prefer to go downtown or to a festival or something like that, I'd prefer to go out and maybe climb a tree, or just be alone in the woods for a while. But then again, how would I know if that's not just a difference in preferences? I mean, I have hobbies such as art and writing that don't quite invoke the same feeling of freedom and escape that being in a forest does, for example, but I'm just not sure if that counts or not, of that makes sense. I'm also not entirely sure how to figure out if I'm actually an animal on the inside. It's really hard to put into words, but if I can't fully trust my past due to suppression, how would I be able to figure out that I am not actually human? I've stalked a couple forums, mainly on Lioden but also on other sites as well, and I was never really able to get a clear answer. I really, really don't want to start identifying as a therian when I'm not 100% sure, since I'd just feel like an imposter. TL;DR is basically I'm not sure how to identify past experiences as actual "signs" rather than regular interests or preferences of mine. Similarly, I'm not sure how pinpoint whether or not I am actually an animal, or am just a human with very animal-esque interests. |
End #33262 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 17:15:52
|
Eulalie #87410 |
|
Posted 2023-10-06 17:25:09
Thank you! I've only lightly touched on some other forums (went in-depth on a couple, but I can definitely do more), mainly because I was helping my partner find info on therians, but I'll definitely revisit them to try and get some more answers! I'm really thankful for the responses here too, since admittedly I'm not the most educated on the subject lol Whatever the answer is, I'm just happy to be discovering more about myself |
End #33262 |
|
Posted 2023-10-16 17:55:14
If anyone's possibly interested, I nowadays I run a small but friendly and reasonably active discord server for anyone who identifies as or with animals -- so that includes therians and animal-hearted folks, but also anyone else who's questioning, doesn't fit neatly into one label category, or just doesn't want to label themself! It's a pretty lighthearted space but there's some folks around who can help answer questions and offer guidance too if you need / want it. We're a tight-knit bunch but super friendly! And the server's very safe and secure, I don't tend to post links to it around without doing any vetting first. '^^ For that reason I'm not gonna post a direct link here, but please feel free to message me if you'd like an invite! |
 Rook #2998 |
|
Posted 2023-10-27 23:02:38
|
Hansi #128783 |